canary in a coal mine; @adnd_master

[pinch_hitter]

[Days go by.

It's weird not to call Munson when whatever random stuff happens and at some point Steve realizes that he's been doing it a lot recently. Calling Eddie. Not as much as Robin but-- maybe second. Maybe a little more than Henderson. Look, Henderson has to split his time. Steve?

Not so much.

So he's at work and this guy comes in. This big guy, 250 pounds of muscle like what is he even doing in Hawkins and he rents Flashdance. There's very little thinking involved as Steve dials Eddie's number from the counter phone as soon as the guy leaves. It's ringing in his ear before he realizes that he and Eddie aren't-- well. Shit.]

Comments

[adnd_master]

[Steve hadn't talked to him fucking days. Days. Eddie must have picked up the phone a million times but every time he did he just put it right back down. Steve had to make the first move here. He was the one who was going through something and he was going to have to be the person who let Eddie know where they stood.

But at this rate the silence was probably the answer. He just didn't want to accept it yet.

Finally, one day, the phone rings. Eddie goes for it, not really thinking that it is going to be Steve. Why would it? He picks it up and cradles it as he lights a cigarette so his hands have something to do. He's smoked a lot of them in the last few days.]

Satan's Den: Give up the ghost and come here to roast. How can I help you?

[pinch_hitter]

[Silence. Something in Steve's stomach turns over at the sound of Eddie's voice. A good sort of turn-over. A sort of good, uncomfortable crawling.

Sexual electricity.

Steve slams the phone down on the cradle.]

[adnd_master]

Oooookay....

[Not the first time he's been hung up on with that greeting. He puts the phone back down and decides maybe it's time for pot instead of cigarettes.

The pack Steve got for him is still sitting on his dresser, untouched. He looks at it and. Yeah. Pot time.]

[pinch_hitter]

[What the hell, Harrington?

Truth is that he'd shoved out of Munson's trailer that day and drove home and all he could think about was the dissonance between how hard he'd come and what his dad would say about sodomy as his fingers gripped the wheel but when the garage had closed behind him...

His house didn't exactly equate safety but it did enforce normal and Steve had shoved the whole encounter out of mind as hard as he'd shoved out of the trailer that morning. He'd driven Robin in for shifts at work. He'd pushed Henderson into his pool and dropped the nerds off at the arcade. Even went out for a boring dinner with his folks.

He picks up the phone and redials Munson's number.]

[adnd_master]

[The phone rings again and Eddie lets it go a little before deciding to answer it. He's pretty sure he knows what is going to greet him on the other side and he frankly doesn't have the patience. He yanks the receiver up and scowls at nothing.]

Look, asshole. If you're here to call me a murderer or whatever, get an original insult, okay? Fucking bored with that one. So either be creative or just leave me alone. Not in the mood for taunts today.

[pinch_hitter]

[There's silence.

Steve is stunned. He knew that shit was bad for Munson, even with his name cleared (just another tick in the good ol' dad column) but the tired edge in Eddie's voice underneath the acid makes Steve feel sick. Shit.

Once again he lets his mouth go because with the first thing still on his tongue:] This Arnold Schwarzenegger dude just came into the store and rented Flashdance. And bought a box of Runts.

[adnd_master]

[It's Steve. It's fucking Steve just talking to him like it hasn't been fucking days after he ran out of his trailer. Part of Eddie wants to just hang up. But he's apparently a sap and a pushover so instead:]

I'm sort of proud of him. Could have hidden it between tapes of action shit but the man knows what he likes. And what he likes is Flashdance.

The Runts though is fucked.

[pinch_hitter]

Right? [There's relief in Steve's voice and he can hear it and he doesn't like it but he can't shut up, either.] Runts are absolutely the worst, the worst. Plus that box has been sitting in our rack before I even started working here. You know how I know it's the same box?

[He pauses for effect but also because his heart is smashing against his throat and he needs to swallow it.] I put a dot on the corner my second week. A little green sharpie dot.

[adnd_master]

[Green. Eddie closes his eyes for a moment, not sure if that was intentional or just fate having a laugh at his misery. He lets out a laugh through the phone that sounds more genuine than it is, hopefully.]

And you still sold it to him. Good job, Harrington. Dude will probably die of Runt-Poisoning. Have fun holding that on your conscience.

[pinch_hitter]

[It's just the sharpie that was closest to his hand at the time. If there's significance to Eddie, Steve doesn't know about it.] You don't think Runts come out of the factory as bad as they're ever gonna get? They're apocalypse-food. Twinkies, Runts, canned goods.

[The conversation ebbs.]

People still giving you shit, huh.

[adnd_master]

Yeah. And in other shocking news, water is wet and the sky is blue.

[He sighs on the line and just sort of collapses onto a nearby seat. ]

They think I got away with murder. I don't know why they think that the way of dealing with that is calling the murderer up and yelling at him, but it's a popular option for these brave vigilantes. And as long as they don't bring out the spray paint or flaming poop, I'm okay.

[pinch_hitter]

[It feels like a mistake, all of this. Because Steve can handle saving the world and defending the kids and going up against Russians with just a stupid Scoops Ahoy hat but handling his personal shit? He's worse at that. Way worse.

Easier to play dumb. Always been easier.

But hearing the resignation in Eddie's voice makes Steve miss him, miss them and whatever weird friendship they'd carved out for themselves with twin sets of scars and a shared understanding of the reality of Hawkins. And maybe he's fucked it all up.]

What assholes. Be nice if they were the ones with the reoccurring nightmares, right, but no-- that would mean karma was working. [Steve flicks a paperclip off the counter and toward the door.]

[adnd_master]

Yeah...

[Eddie can feel the fragile peace between them. The unspoken words that can be buried instead of tossed between them. Eddie knows right now he can accept this white flag and just go on like nothing is wrong. Like nothing happened.

But that just feels too much like running and he's made it pretty clear he's done with that shit.]

So... Was that why you called? The Runts and the Flashdance? Was that it?

[pinch_hitter]

I--

[It's a condemnation and yeah, fair. Steve swallows.] Yeah, man. Just saw it and thought of you. [He's a coward. Worse, because he's baiting Eddie. Wants the other man to bite so that he doesn't have to.]

[adnd_master]

[Unfortunately for Steve, Eddie isn't feeling particularly bite-y anymore. Not after what happened last time. Not when there was so much unsettled between them. ]

Ah. Okay, well. Thanks, for that. Pretty funny. Give me another call when something else makes you think of me, I guess. Should be another four days or so? [Okay, that wasn't fair but he's bitter. Just a little...]

[pinch_hitter]

[Yeah, he probably deserves that but Steve stiffens at the snap anyway and his stomach twists sourly. It's still not fair. Sure, he left like he had and sure, it took him four days to call, but jesus christ, Eddie had--

He'd--

Whatever and Steve shouldn't have to carry all of that shit, right? Shouldn't be blamed for not (thinking about it at all) figuring it out.] Yeah. [His voice is an unSteve-like burr.] Well in that case, I'm off tomorrow so make sure to come return the movie.

[adnd_master]

[Eddie snorts a humorless laugh.]

Seriously, man? This is seriously how you're gonna handle this?

[He scrubs at his face and sighs.]

If you wanna forget about the whole thing, fine. If you wanna go find some chick to bang and never talk about anything we did, whatever. Fine. Just tell me what the fucking score is, dude. Are we still friends? Are we...

[Another sigh.]

I don't know what to do, Steve. Just give me a hint.

[pinch_hitter]

I called you!

[He yells it. Shit.

Steve slaps a hand against his face as a customer in the corner looks over and this is not how he thought-- well. Hadn't really thought anything about it, had he? His voice drops.] I saw that dude and I called you and I hung up when I realized what I did but I called back because.

I miss you? [Jesus christ why did his voice go up at the end of that.]

[adnd_master]

[Jesus H. Christ. Steve missed him. He left in the wee hours of the morning and didn't call for four days and now? Now he missed him? And that is supposed to be enough?]

...I miss you, too.

[He's a fucking pushover and he sort of hates himself.]

I was really hoping you'd call sooner, you know. It's been....it's been shitty not hearing anything.

[pinch_hitter]

[Anyone else would have hung Steve out to dry. There had been more than enough sorry, baby's in his life for him to know that. But with those girls he'd gotten bored of them and then they called out.

Now he's being just being called out.]

You said you didn't care if we stopped. [No, he won't let himself sound wounded... but he does.]

[adnd_master]

You're gullible, you know that?

[He is silent for awhile but then exhales.]

I care more about making sure you stick around than whether or not you want to have sex with me. I mean, don't get me wrong. The sex is great. But it's not great enough that I would trade you as a friend for it.

[He bites his lip and twirls the cord around his finger nervously.]

[pinch_hitter]

[The words stick like barbs in the soft spots between his ribs. It is because he's hanging onto the part where he had the best orgasm of maybe his life? Shit. But Steve does miss the stupid, nothing conversations. He misses Eddie's running commentary.

He misses Eddie.]

I don't want to wait another four days, man. If this is gonna mess us up we can just not do it, right?

[adnd_master]

[Eddie feels his last shreds of hope splinter like so much glass and dig into his chest. Of course Steve would default to this. Him thinking this would ever end any other way was naive and childish.

Steve and he were always on borrowed time when it came to their weird relationship. The timer just finally buzzed.]

Yeah. Yeah, if this is too much for you or whatever, I would rather have you as a friend than nothing at all, man. So we can just. Stop. No problem.

[pinch_hitter]

Cool.

[He'd always been good at playing dumb, even when it meant convincing himself. Dumb meant you didn't have to deal; dumb meant others didn't have to deal either. So they could both breathe now and just... go back.] You were right, you know? You said you'd been through this before and I--

It's just better like this. Because if not you, who do I have to (look at me and come) complain about Runts to?

[Steve puts his head on the counter. The customer browsing the shelves leaves, the door chiming softly.]

[adnd_master]

A very important quality for a friend to have. [Even when he was breaking his heart, Steve was cute. Eddie can't help but be charmed by him. It's a fucking curse but he has no defense against it. Steve is who he is. And for some reason who he is ends up being someone Eddie is completely gone on.]

But let's not talk about that and instead keep telling me that I was right. I do love hearing that. [He affects a voice that is clearly supposed to be Steve. If Steve were a little old lady who might be a little British.] Oh, Eddie! You're so wise and brilliant. So amazing. I should always listen to you and your incredible advice.