8.19.22 TFLN Overflow

[pinch_hitter]

1. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition.
2. I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY drinking.
3. My autobiography would just be "probably should have thought this through" typed over and over.
4. We are gonna play a game I like to call what the hell is in my pocket.
5. Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to get off when she sounds like Markie Mark.

Comments

@adnd_master

[pinch_hitter]

[continues from here]

[Shit. When Eddie's fingers pull at his hair, Steve forgets that he has a handful of his own. He's utterly content to kiss back, sloppy and hungry and not-quite-rushed; it's only when there's a question on Eddie's tongue instead of another tongue does Steve blink and try to refocus. Probably wouldn't bother to try making good on his word after a kiss like that, but Eddie says baby again.

Steve straightens from his knees and forces Eddie upward too before giving him a shove backward, two palms to chest.] Harrington house, Harrington rules.

[adnd_master]

[Oh, okay. Steve is gonna be like that.

Eddie grabs his wrists as they push on him and tugs as he falls back a step. The goal is to get Steve off balance so Eddie can have the upper hand.

And an armful of mostly naked Steve. That is also the goal like 90% of the time.]

What other rules do I have to obey? Hm? I'm used to being on the other side of that.

[pinch_hitter]

[Still kneeling, Steve has no way to keep himself planted when Eddie yanks on his wrists. Yeah-- the edge of the bed is too close and, yeah-- aiming to cling to Eddie instead is basically the only choice that he has if he doesn't want to take a face-dive onto the floor. So he clings.

What he wants is to tell Eddie something lewd, like get on your knees and I'll make you stop but the truth is that Steve's a pushover and everyone who actually knows him knows it. Hell the first time he and Munson ever said two words to each other Eddie was holding him against a wall. Not that he's in a much better physical situation at the moment.]

No taking advantage of your host, how about that?

[adnd_master]

[Eddie flattens his hand and runs it down Steve's bare back. Pulling it back up he curls the fingers so blunt nails leave gentle scratches along the way. No marks yet. Just the distant promise of them.]

Taking advantage? Is that what I'm doing?

[His other hand slides to Steve's waist and down, right over his ass.]

Hm. I think I disagree, but your house and your rules. Should I back up?

[pinch_hitter]

[The only way to go, really, is forward, because Steve refuses to let Eddie see how his eyes start to roll up with the ghost of his fingernails against his back.] Shut up, Munson. [So he brings their mouths together again, a bit too rough and there's a small clack of teeth, as he tries to get his back legs off the bed and onto the floor in a better position.]

[adnd_master]

[Ouch.]

Sweetheart...I love the enthusiasm but not all of us have money for the dentist.

[He's still smiling as he notices Steve's attempt to get off the bed and instead starts to use his advantage to push him backwards. Eddie bends as he kisses Steve a bit more gently and puts one hand on the mattress to encourage Steve to lay down on it. He seems like he's in a feisty mood so forcing him is completely out of the question.]

Where are you going...hm? [He all but growls the question against Steve's lips.] Got somewhere else to be?

@tenthfloor

[pinch_hitter]

[continued from here]

Yup. Gotta get rid of it somehow but don't worry it's like, total apocalypse candy.
Tootsie rolls and twinkies.

[tenthfloor]

[ Steve?! 😭 why are you so drunkenly determined to give him the shit candy? ]

okay, but what if we took it a step up and you gave me a snickers or something? some m&ms? maybe m&ms for the popcorn.

[pinch_hitter]

That shit is for stoners, Byers, but if you're offering to bring something then perhaps we can work out mandm's for the popcorn.

[tenthfloor]

[ how did this turn into mildly taking advantage of an ostensibly drunk Steve to BARTERING?? ]

maybe. what do you want? what are you even drinking?

@otherbitches

[pinch_hitter]

[continues from here]

[The idea of cougars is great and yeah, Steve is into it, but he's outnumbered and the alcohol has gone a bit past the helpful point.

Billy's got enough 'Jesus Christs' for a church so Steve is starting to worry-- but the advice, when it comes, is good. Yeah, okay.]

Shit that actually worked. Shelby has nice boobies.
They are? They are.
The blonde is married because she's got a ring and her name is Vanessa.
No ring on Shelby.
Single and ready to mingle!

Vanessa looks like your type by the way. Total Hargrove material.

[otherbitches]

[ Hahahaha. Boobies. Steve's so stupid, and Billy should be drunker for this, but maybe then he'd be calling down the saints too. But Steve can't hear him cackling at least. ]

even easier
you either got a divorcee looking for a rebound or a serial dater whose usual dates are balding suits
and youve got good hair if nothing else

yeah?
what do you think my type is?

[pinch_hitter]

Definitely have good hair that's true.
Cmon everyone knows you don't bother with the girls at school so
You know
Figure you like them more experienced.

[otherbitches]

[ Billy would know. It had been real thick when he'd grabbed Steve's hair like a dog's scruff. ]

thats because they all want me to clean up for their daddy and take them to prom.
so you figure my type is anybody over forty who'll fuck me?
think im that easy?

you touch her at all yet?
get your hand on her forearm, touch her wrist with your finger tips
smile, moron.

[pinch_hitter]

[Steve tries not to remember that. The bite of the chainlink against his back, the pads of Billy's fingers against his scalp. It floats to the top of his conscious at the wrong sorts of times.

Like now, as he has a gorgeous woman laughing with him and he just stares at you touch her at all?]

Big jump between high school and 40 you know
Didn't realize you liked them mom-age.

[And then the quick replies stop because it's hard to touch and type at the same time.]

[otherbitches]

[ Billy thinks about it when he does his own hair, gets the product in when it's wet, finger brushes through. It's less thick than Steve's. But it's good. All the girls say so. Steve's was real thick though. ]

a milf can be whatever age she wants
but you said cougar, man
thats gotta be above 40

so where are you doing this?
gonna get her a motel or she gonna take you back to her place?

[ he's invested now. who knows why. ]

@hamshack

[pinch_hitter]

[Continues from! (Also that link killed me LOL)]

[Well essentially he picks up the phone.]

Hello this is Steve Video. Nope. Family Steve you kill 'em we grill em--

--Yo buddy! [It's shouted into the phone but it's not for the phone at all.] What'cha need? Some romance? Comedy? We have all the sections! It's Tuesday night but that doesn't mean you can't have a little fun, right my man? Yeah, you get me!

[Laughing, he props his elbow on the counter and remembers he has a phone in his hand.] Family Steve this is Steve how can I help you tonight?

[hamshack]

[ That shouting nearly surprises him off the road, so strap in to hear that later, but for now, there's a slightly lisping Wilford Brimley on the other line, fully kerfuffled. ]

Excuse me, sirra! I'm in need of a fine film and I need you to find it for me! Right away! Posthaste!

[pinch_hitter]

[Steve blinks. Whoa. Whoa.]

Uh, yeah. Yup. I can do that. [What the hell does posthaste mean? Did he just say that out loud?

He decides to continue on as if he hadn't either way.] What'cha need?

[hamshack]

Oh it's the one! You know--the one in the far corner? Fuh, fuh--please, young man, you must assist me. I should think you'll find it in the, erm, eh, the-- [ Damn, what is in that far corner? ] --kung fu films! Yes! Could you have a look for me, sirra?

[pinch_hitter]

[A Steve far less drunk on shitty vodka would have asked what kung-fu movie, maybe even asked Karate Kid or The Last Dragon but this Steve is not that Steve. This is Steve Video.]

Sure thing, man, hold on okay? I'll find you your kung-fu corner.

[There's no hold; Steve just puts the phone on the counter and grabs a tootsie roll on his way to the corner.

Kung-fu isn't the corner, it's Romance, but the guy sounded real intent like he knew so Steve starts searching for Kung fu Romance.]

@cheersquads

[pinch_hitter]

[continued from here]

Yeah it's where like something doesn't matter, right? Doesn't matter than I'm not going to college.
Maybe they'll fund something else. Trip to Bermuda? Shopping at the Gap?
Possibilities are endless.

[cheersquads]

Right, of course.

( oh steve. it's a good thing you're cute. )

I'd say I'm a little jealous, but I can't afford to finance shopping sprees or personal vacations, so have fun!

@obeyyourdm

[pinch_hitter]

[continued from here]

You could
Hang out and read to me?

[obeyyourdm]

Yes.

I narrate stories when I play Dungeons and Dragons, it's not that weird.